Thursday, August 27, 2015

Tap into the primal you, continued...

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I know what it feels like to find yourself corned in a situation that you’ve somehow played a part in and seems like it has stolen your spirit. I remember looking into the eyes of my two little boys while feeling the heartache of my unhealthy marriage and wondering how I got there. I knew I would turn over the earth if I had to in order to give my kids a healthier life, and in the aftermath, it felt like I actually had done this. I went into primal mode for a number of years. I leaned on my gut instinct to rise out of the ashes and into a brighter future. It was exhausting. I sacrificed much of myself but in hindsight, I think all of my hard work and sleepless nights had paid off in the end.

I think for most of us we have a hopeful spirit and sometimes when this hopeful spirit is spent on the shortcomings of others, it can mislead us. We start living our fantasy instead of accepting the reality of life in the present. When you are in this vicious cycle, days, weeks, months, and years can go on and as time passes it layers more and more pain into the situation. Suddenly, you wonder, “How did I get here and how did I let this happen?” It is ugly and it takes a lot of work to unwind the tangled mess. But it isn’t the end of the world; it can be fixed.

I think I surfaced my primal self and lived with this person for several years. What does this mean? I pushed forward in survival mode (it was all I had left to give) and eventually after a few years I was able to accomplish enough to rise from the ashes and be triumphant.

I will always persevere. I know this because I am someone who believes in a higher power and this source keeps me moving through and overcoming anything I need to in order to find my way. While I may be a victim in life at times, it is only in the moment of the hardship then my survival mode kicks in and keeps me in transition until I find my way triumphantly.

I believe this power to be in all of us, all we have to do is tap into it! What are you waiting for, isn’t time for you to persevere?

Monday, August 24, 2015

Overcome the mundane through exploration, continued...

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I remember as a child looking up to the sky and imagining the great vacations I would be going on as I gazed at the airplanes soaring across the skyline above me. We didn’t have the money to go on vacation when I was little and because of this it seemed to fuel my need for discovery. I told my mom I was going to travel the world and I must say, I’ve worked hard to keep this promise.

My first real trip I took was with a friend and I was 17 years old; we flew to Florida for 3 weeks. I had worked hard and saved for the trip and it was worth every penny. Since then I’ve taken 1 or 2 vacations a year via car, ship, and/or plane and I’ve loved every minute of it.

Tonight, I’m sitting in Savanna Georgia as I write this blog. We’re staying in the historic district downtown off the river and it is absolutely beautiful. From the trees, the cobblestone streets, the waterfront views, the local culture, food and shopping, to the history experienced in this area, all of it energizes my spirit. We flew into a stormy evening but even the rain didn’t damper this adventure. We walked around, enjoyed a tasty seafood dinner and then, to my surprise, we were in awe as we were able to witness a double rainbow that appeared above in the heavens. It was the end to a perfect evening and I caught as much as possible on film.

Whether we’re flying off somewhere or driving away in the care, I love to explore. It really is a way to invigorate your life.

Where is the last place you visited? Tell me about it, I might want to go!

Saturday, August 22, 2015

Would you like a do-over? continued...

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This month has had me thinking about all of the change that is in my world right now and while at times this may feel overwhelming, when I can shift my nervous energy into curiosity, it is all about new beginnings and excitement.

I have to share that I sincerely feel blessed. I am by no means well to do but I feel rich in the blessings that are intertwined into the fibers of my journey. I have so many beautiful souls in my life it amazes me by how much love I feel; my eyes well up when I think about it. This means the world to me. I believe I have a team of angels that help keep me in God’s light and I’m grateful for this celestial guidance; without it I would be lost.

But as I find my footing onto the paths of new beginnings, I am excited about what is to come. I married a wonderful man this week; he is someone whom I feel truly gets me and accepts me just as I am.  He supports my endeavors and helps me to bring my best self forward; he is pretty awesome!

I also finished my Master’s of Art Degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling. I’m now making my way through the state licensing processing and eager to be hands on in the field.

The old me would have wanted to fast forward 5 years ahead in my life to see where this all takes shape but today I have realized that the journey gifts much more than the destination. In the meanwhile I will appreciate each breath I take and embrace each as a moment anew.

Are you ready for a new beginning? What has stopped you? Let’s talk about it.

Saturday, August 15, 2015

Perfectionism stifles the human experience, continued...

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“In a perfect world…,” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve used this phrase; our world is far from perfect and I believe this to be a good thing. Without its flaws it would be mundane. Think of all of the triumphs in your life, had the world been perfect you would not have had these experiences. My quest for perfectionism just about killed me in my young adult life. I was adamant that I had to be the perfect mother, cook, housekeeper, wife, daughter, sister, employee and so on; and, this didn’t work out so well for me. When we are putting all of our energy into being perfect in all areas of our lives, we drain ourselves physically and mentally. We become disappointed with not only ourselves but with those who surround us to. We expect too much, the impossible day after day!

I think the intent is good beneath the expection, we just want the best in our world but we’re not considering that the best is still flawed. We have to be realistic and when we’re able to do this, we stop sacrificing our peace of mind and energy, which is really to precious to give away unnecessarily.

My creative spirit, over the years, has helped me to come to appreciate my flaws. When I mess up in a drawing or work of art, I now try to embrace it and work to make this new attribute part of the piece. It may have not been in my original vision but it was something that came to the surface and exposed itself and I believe this was a piece of vulnerability that needed to come forward. When we can focus on the good stuff in life instead of trying to control an outcome and just put forth our best, somehow the universe helps puts the pieces together and it all tends to work out.

When I think of all the time I have spent worrying about things that were out of my control, I realized how I sacrificed my health. Today, perfection still rears its ugly head but I am a bit quicker to notice it and then realign by pulling back the reigns a bit. I’m getting there. How about you?

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

Overcome cravings through impulse control, continued...

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I’m right here with you making attempts to live a healthier life. And, although I may fail a number of times, when I look at my life today, it is much healthier than the life I led 5 years ago so I’m trending in the right direction. And, my small successes are adding up and helping me! It is helpful to look at trends in your journey instead of day-by-day analysis; it is more compassionate and eyeopening this way.

WebMD.comadvice for developing impulse control, “You can improve self-control at any age, according to Marc N. Potenza, MD.
For kids: Practice, practice. Learning social skills such as sharing, taking turns, and letting others talk is not only polite, it's an exercise in impulse control. Starting this training early helps build this brain function and instills good habits.
For grown-ups: "Trying to foster good habits in people at an early age is helpful but it's never too late. People can change -- particularly if they are motivated to change," says Potenza. To fight temptation, try substituting a healthier immediate reward for the less desirable treat you crave. For example, put a dollar into a vacation fund every time you resist the urge to have a drink.
If tips don't do the trick, medications combined with cognitive behavior therapy can reduce compulsive behaviors, including gambling and substance abuse.”

Remember not to be to harsh on yourself during the change process; self-love enables positive change while bullying yourself only makes you feel worse.

The message here, you can develop impulse control and this is key to your persevering spirit actually manifesting positive change. Don’t give up!

What are you trying to change? Tell me about it.