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As a recovering perfectionist, “should of thinking” has caused a lot of anxiety in my life. What do I mean by this? It had sabotaged any effort for genuine rest in my young adult life. Instead of relaxing after a hard day at work I would torture myself with a running list of all of the chores I should be doing and then I’d force myself to spend hours on stuff that in the big scheme of things was really insignificant. I cheated myself from true self-care in these early years in some attempt to be perfect in everything; over-achiever thinking.
As I’ve matured I have realized the value of my own thinking, my priorities and passion and let’s not forget how important mindfulness - being in the present moment type of thinking is to our lives. I am not obligated to anything other then that which I decide is important. If I value it, I’ll be in the action mode instead of a self-guilt mode.
A way to be more kind to ourselves and to make sure we are living our own lives as we intend is to make sure we are living in the present moment. If we are fully embracing this very moment, we’re not thinking about what we should be doing. If we are thinking about it, we must challenge this thinking. Why do we feel obligated to point out something we are not doing and by whose standard is this requirement? If it were something of value to us, we wouldn’t have to mentally torture ourselves into action.
Perhaps a positive spin is to think of all that we’ve done instead of what isn’t enough!
I’m all about self-love today.
What do you think, is living your life by “should of thinking” a bad habit or is it okay?