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I think, when I was a young mother, I was selfless and this was probably not very smart. I was sick a lot because my immune system was compromised from a lack of sleep, and from being overworked. At the time, I didn’t get a lot of support at home and I was also working full time outside of the house. I have two boys 17 months apart and they kept me moving. It really wasn’t until I was in my 40’s (I’ll be 45 years old in a few days) that I started putting me on my priority list without feeling guilty about it.
I do not consider myself selfish because I am a sharing person. But, there are times, depending on the situation, when I choose it is in mine and the other person’s best interest not to enable them by providing an offering of some sort; some might call this tough-love.
When I think of selfishness, teenagers come to mind; I think most adolescents go through a period where they are self-centered and the world evolves around them. People can drop around them and they will still take on the victim role. Thank God most of them grow out of this stage; my experience is usually by the time they are about 18 years old, these young adults start to realize their impact on others.
What are your thoughts about selfless and selfishness? Where are you on this spectrum?