Sunday, September 9, 2012

A healed productive life, continued...

Photo of Tracy O'Brien provided by Tracy

Click on the below article link to obtain background information to this blog post:

Tracy O’Brien continued her interview. She discussed her work today in mentorship.

In her words, “In my courses, there is a class on forgiveness and how it will free you emotionally so you can move on into the life you would love to live.  My words in this class carry weight because I have been through the deepest betrayal and pain, have been treated unfairly and suffered because of it, but found the way to forgive. If I hadn’t gone through all of this, would I have the authority to speak about it? There is a saying that where you are wounded, that is where you will have the authority to heal. But first you have to get to your own personal healing. 

One of the mindsets that went a long way to helping me through the pain was the thought that someday, this immense pile of crap would become fertilizer that would enrich my life and the lives of others. Look for the good in every situation, and you will find those gems. It goes beyond ‘What doesn’t kill you makes you strong.’ You will not only become stronger, but there is an opportunity for tremendous mental, emotional, and spiritual growth as well.”

Tracy talk about her conversations with God and forgiveness.

“There was a time when I told Him, ‘I know I need to forgive, but everything in me rejects that idea. I’m willing to be willing, but that’s about as far as I can take it on my own. I need Your help.’ And yes, I did get that help. It was a gradual process, and honestly, there are still days when I have to do it all over again.

One of the most powerful techniques I teach for facilitating this process is to take control of your mind. Whenever the images, the story of the pain surfaces and starts to drag you down that hellish path again, take back control of your thought processes and choose to say, ‘I forgive and I’m moving on.’ Choose to replace that thought with something else that gives you life and joy.  

The times that I found it hardest to forgive were when I was replaying all the scenes of hurt and betrayal. My emotions would get all stirred up again, and I’d be right back in the middle of the agony. I didn’t have to go there, I chose to.  I don’t do that anymore, especially since I learned that what I think about, especially with emotion, is what I attract into my life.”

She discussed her life now, “My Kristin turns 12 in November, 2012, and she has informed her dad that she’s moving home. My two older daughters refused to move back with him, and we still live together and work together in my coaching business. We have an awesome relationship, and can’t wait to be together every day again. Interesting side note: a psychiatrist that I talked with after the court case thought it was quite amusing that I had every weekend with her. He explained that I had prime time and should use it to full advantage to maintain and grow our relationship. It worked!
There is no greater loss than the loss of a child. The only thing that got me through these tragedies was clinging to God and trusting that good would come of it. The good that came from Cody’s death was a deeper understanding of God’s power, and the ability to reach out and touch grieving parents in a way that someone who hasn’t been there wouldn’t be able to do. Where you’ve been wounded, there you have the power to heal.”

Her closing words, “So what’s going on in your life that may be an opportunity for growth and a deeper spiritual life? You have two choices – just endure and become bitter, or endure, grow and thrive. You CAN choose the latter and live it. I will help you where I can. You can reach me at 

My book, as of this writing, is still in process. If you check my site, I’ll keep you posted as to when it’s available. 

You are more powerful and precious than you know. Your family needs you to rise up strong and loving from what you’re going through. Your society needs you to be the powerhouse that you were designed to be.  Rise up, dear one, and be the light the rest of us need.”

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